Feeling unneeded, a disillusioned Santa Claus (Charles Durning) quits Christmas. Through the selflessness of a little girl looking to reunite her parents for Christmas (and the help of his bumbling chief elf, Philpot (Bruce Vilanch), Santa and the child travel across America and Santa discovers that people really do need him and care about other people.
It's December 1999 and as the end of the millennium approaches, people are attempting to find spiritual enlightenment. However, a few people want to skip all the work that entails. A holy Tenctonese relic in the hands of a heretic is giving them a shortcut but it's not quite as easily controlled as she says.